Hostile Aggressive Parenting: Is It a Form of Child Abuse? (Pt 3)

February 7, 2018 Abuse and Neglect Attorney
A hostile aggressive parent uses a variety of tools to manipulate a child’s perspective

Welcome back, and thanks for joining us for the third installment in this discussion on hostile aggressive parenting. We’ve talked about what exactly hostile aggressive parenting is, how it differs from parental alienation (but can lead to that!) and why it’s considered to be child abuse. Moving on we’re going to wrap up this series with a look at what the signs of hostile aggressive parenting are in an ex, and how to spot them.

How could a child buy into the idea that one parent is “bad”?

The signs of Parental Alienation can be subtle at first, and sometimes hard to separate from the inevitable grief and hostility that many children suffer in the wake of a divorce. But if your ex is attempting to poison your child against you, or disrupt your relationship with them, you will be able to tell. Your child will likely become more distant, less responsive, less likely to want to be with you or talk to you. You will notice signs and indicators of their gradual belief that you are to be feared or alienated.

But how does your ex achieve this? It seems preposterous to a parent that their child could believe anything about them that isn’t true. After all, they love their children and want good things for them, so how on earth could their child believe anything different? Surely your child knows you love them? It seems unbelievable that your devotion would be questioned. And yet children are easier to influence that many people realize. Their feelings can be manipulated. Their perspectives can be changed.

Is your ex a hostile aggressive parent?

You probably know your ex better than most people. And yet there are many aspects of people’s personalities that don’t come out until they are hurt, or angry. If your divorce was high conflict, with lots of fighting, name calling and accusations, then your ex may still be bitter. And angry, bitter parents are common candidates for hostile aggressive parenting. Despite the harm it does to children.

According to Douglas Darnall, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist and prolific writer on the subject of hostile aggressive parenting, there are three categories of parents who engage in hostile aggressive techniques with their children. These are:

  • Naïve alienators:

These are parents who are passive about their children’s relationship with the other parent. However, they occasionally do or say something that may alienate the other parent. Dr. Darnall says that almost all parents can do this, even if they don’t realize what they’re doing.  

  • Active alienators:

Like naive alienators, these parents also know better than to alienate the other parent. They know it’s wrong. But their intense emotional pain or anger causes them to lose control, and say or do things that cause their child to fear or reject the other parent. Later on these parents often feel guilty about what they said or did to cause the rift between their child and the other parent.

  • Obsessed alienators:

These parent feel no guilt about what they’re doing. They have a fervent desire to destroy the other parent at any cost, and they do not care if the process causes harm to their children or anyone else. These parents are more calculated, vicious, and manipulative than the average parent.

Are you being targeted by a manipulative ex?

So is your ex targeting you? Are they trash talking you to your kids, or working hard to break down the relationship you share with your children? If so, you’re going to need the help of a skilled child abuse defense attorney who has handled hostile aggressive parenting cases before, and understands what they entail. You need an experienced attorney who can fight for your rights, and help you protect your future relationship with your children.

So call The Kronzek Firm at 866 766 5245 today, and discuss your situation with someone who understand what you’re up against, and knows what comes next. We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, to help you sort through your legal troubles and help you protect your family. And if your ex is accusing you of alienating them and poisoning your children against them, we can help with that as well!